Emotional Resilience in Action

Mining Magic in Paradise

2010-05-16T16:51:00.003+10:00

In the early evening a solitary Noisy Miner bird enjoyed the nectar willingly served up by the brilliant new bloom. This marvellous bird of paradise flower is the focal point at the end of my garden. The bird, a resolute creature, came each day, working with diligence and persistence to extract every essence from that single flower and enjoy the fruits of his labour.

I appreciate my garden and smiled as I wandered by this wonderful display of nature at work. My own enjoyment was short lived however, as I later noticed that in his somewhat over zealous activity he had pecked the centre right out of the flower... there it lay wilting on the ground!

It had bloomed brightly and early bursting with youthful pride and served as an exciting vibrancy of colour against the grey February skies of that last few days. Oh well, I mused, c'est la vie, just the cycle of life.

Imagine my surprise when two days later I noticed that the centre of the same flower had re-grown, a new and proud burst of life! Sure enough the bird returned and within a day the centre fell yet again. I was amazed at this and even more-so when it again was decimated re-grew a third time!

Well now things were getting interesting, I wondered what would happen next? I know something about the resilience of people but I had never been so focused on the resilience of a single flower. Amazing stuff happening right under my nose, which up until now I had overlooked!

A fleeting glance to the end of my garden two days on, rapidly became entranced focus. It seemed to me that there was more colour than is possible from this one stem. On closer inspection the most amazingly beautiful transformation had taken place. The single stem stood strong and the marvellous plant had brought forth two complete blooms from that one stem!

A double bird of paradise flower is not some new phenomenon unique to my garden. However, it may as well have been, given it had escaped my notice. For me it was a new and exciting discovery. I have never witnessed anything first hand that quite so obviously exudes the wonders of nature! A true and natural example of resilience, natural magic easily overlooked on an average day.

It seems to me that both bird and plant played the game. What initially appeared to be disaster for one ultimately provided a win for both. Each persisted with their natural instincts to grow, to endure, to be resilient and to find mutual benefit in the process.

There is no natural growth without sacrifice, no bloom without first weathering the seasons and the natural external elements. However, growth is dependent on the health of the specimen, the natural ability to grow with and from experience, and the resilience to keep blooming after storms and strife.

It is on the greyest of days that my double orange flower in its pot at the end of my garden fully displays its colour. In the overcast hue the orange, in direct contrast to the background, is more obvious, more intense, more easily noticed and appreciated. Whereas on other brighter days it may be lost amongst the blue of the sky and the myriad of garden colours competing for an appreciative eye.

Like life itself, when days are grey we have an opportunity to either overlook or to notice the beauty in things and people that otherwise elude us.

On grey days, lift your head a little and appreciate what you see anew. As if by magic your emotional resilience will rise within you and your ability to reason and respond will come to the fore.

Grey days then become an opportunity to mine the magic that may be in range of sight yet not apparent to our mindset. Uncovering these gems allows us to fully display our own full colours, magically influencing others and leading them into a brighter day.

Until next time, keep blooming!

Noelene Dawes

A Scintillating Sense of Spice

2010-03-01T20:22:00.003+11:00

"Miss Nolan, you seem so like Indonesian people, maybe you should stay here permanently". My dear friend and business colleague Bapak Dharmapoli made this remark on one of our trips to provincial Indonesia, this time to Medan in Sumatra.

It's funny how some comments stay with you, how they tend to cause you to reflect on the greater inference. How was it that I seemed to my Indonesian friends to be like them... and, what did that say about how I had changed?

My role was Technical Advisor to Asuransi Jasa Indonesia, a state owned enterprise with branches as entrenched throughout the archipelago as jack fruit and palm trees are on the vast 17,000 plus islands. I was representing my Australian company, the only expatriate, my mission to gather market intelligence and seek potential joint venture partners. Given my success in sales, with people and relating, my CEO said I was the one for the job.

You learn a lot about communicating over four years in a challenging environment, make a lot of friends in the process and understand well what you don't understand about communicating and don't need to.

My first week was one of awkward adventure...

The cloud of clove cigarettes wafted through the dining room, and, combined with the sweet smells of spice and unrecognisable dishes, told me I was definitely in foreign territory. The President Director ushered me in and offered me a seat.

I had met each of the senior executives beforehand and made a dull attempt to pronounce their names and attune my foreign ear to their unique accents. A soft yet proper friendliness permeated the room and made me feel very welcome. This environment allowed an awkward yet fascinated and dedicated learning to begin. Subsequently this allowed for my slow yet real progress over the next few months and years where I gained and gave trust and information for mutual benefit and understanding.

How did I seem to become like my friends? Because I was fascinated and could take nothing for granted. I continued to focus on each person, continued to gently ask questions, to listen with more finely attuned ears, to see with new eyes, to appreciate the scintillating sense of spice in the variety of personalities as well as culture.

In doing so I had not changed at all, but found a new way to release more of my real self, showing my respect and love for people and personality. I came to know that learning about people is a constant and open art. Business results follow as a natural consequence.

This is a part of my drive, for assisting you to connect with clarity, to be curious, fascinated, and not take anyone or anything for granted in your communicating, lest you diminish your influence.

Whether it is your closest family member or a corporate colleague, as soon as you make automatic judgements when communicating with others you muddy the mix of messages and compound the potential for conflict and mistrust.

Communication is a noun, communicate is a verb... one of the continuous kind! By that I mean there can be no end to the art of communicating since it is open to interpretation.

It is less than ninety years since people throughout the Indonesian archipelago have been speaking one language, Bahasa Indonesia. Three hundred and seventy five different dialects are spoken and cultures within the culture itself are diverse. As they grow together as a nation I have witnessed first hand the way in which they show real respect to and appreciation for each other's differences in the nuances of doing business.

So imagine if you took a foreigner's perspective, stopped assuming you know absolutely what another person is thinking, that you are right about his/her intentions and motivations? What might you learn about how well you communicate? and... What difference could that potentially make to your business and your life?

I challenge you to become fascinated with, curious about and scintillated by the people you assume you know. They will feel more important and your authentic influence will begin to permeate with a new and scintillating sense of spice!

Enjoy the experience!

Noelene Dawes

A Scintillating Sense of Spice

2009-11-05T17:05:00.002+11:00

You learn a lot about communicating over four years in a challenging environment, make a lot of friends in the process and understand well what you don't understand about communicating...

Suddenly is Just a Perception

2009-11-05T16:56:00.002+11:00

A city building seems to appear overnight! Despite the daily disruptions to traffic and pedestrians, the noise and the occasional waft of dust, most of the toil is hidden. Barricades appear early, supporting health and safety and containing the collating of the nuts, bolts and concrete of construction.

The barricades mask the goings on with visual trickery. Appealing mural images appear that mimic nature, perhaps an ocean theme, rain forest or open desert plains.

We know intellectually that meticulous work goes on, but we have no real sense of it.

Long before the site is prepared, ideas spark and money lights the flame, lest there is no manifesting the idea. Land is cleared, and the creative work begins. Plans are drawn and submitted, approvals sort and checked.

Back at the site... over time the foundations are laid, tiers are constructed, utilities are connected, the face begins to take shape while the fixtures and fittings add polish and pizzaz.

We know construction is taking place and we participate as onlookers, at a distance, no hands in the dirt for us. Still it seems one day, almost overnight, this building appears as the barricades come down and the spectacle reveals itself!

Suddenly! to the eye it appears, how amazing! Why? Because we are removed from the minute actions over extended time that made it reality. Regardless of positive or negative aspects, situations and results that suddenly appear are created by minute movements in a particular direction over time.

Like bear and bull markets, fortunes won and lost as well as overnight success and downfall... suddenly is just a perception!

It seems that so many people who are feeling frustrated with not making progress on their dreams of bettering themselves, talk to me of their frustrations with themselves... the ought to have done, the want to do and the wish to do. They look at others who have "made it" and it looks so easy from a distance!

Intellectually they want to take up something or give up something to make dreams reality, but the will does not always support the skill!

Here is the thing... you may have heard (me say) that to trigger internal change you need a reason big enough or consequence dire enough but that is not sufficient to action change, that is merely the trigger.

Let's assume you are brilliant and you have the answers, since you do! Think about a situation where you have successfully effected change for yourself... what was it that effected the change? How can you take a higher perspective to extract the approach? How can you use that information to help you now?

Let's now assume that, armed with that knowledge, you can do with some extra insights to flip your knowledge into wisdom.

The usual pattern for non-change is decide, try, regress, try, regress, feel guilt, feel angst, forget progress made, indulge in the unwanted behaviour etc, etc "Oh my goodness it is too hard, I can't do it, I'll never do it"

Best think about the building. Firstly remember that there is always a price to pay. What are you prepared to pay to get the result? It may be time, different daily choices or actual money! Whatever it is, recognise and begin the instalments.

Secondly, driving yourself to change is macro and it happens with micro steps. Every single micro measured step in the right direction gets you to your objective. Measure your success by these micro steps... in the right direction.

Use your visual trickery to mask the gradual progress, you have a secret! It looks as if nothing is happening and others will continue to see you as you are. Often you may feel unsupported by others, but they can't feel what you feel and they may seem to thwart your efforts.

You though, know better and... when you have taken sufficient easy, micro steps, and as you begin to feel the result of easy consistent effort effect the change, they will see it... sudden change! Then they will celebrate with you and adopt you as their hero.

One of my favourite quotes is an excerpt from writing by Goethe "Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it" Go on! Have a go!

Until next month get a clear perception of what you want and suddenly begin the micro to macro way to change!

Noelene Dawes

Lured by desire deterred by duty

2009-09-15T14:47:00.004+10:00

I wonder if you have ever taken the lead to drive an idea to reality and found that the enthusiasm and action you require from others is waning?

Here is the leadership opportunity that is embedded in every activity. First you begin by leading yourself and, if there are others involved, you must lead them... but only if you want them to help you achieve what you want!

Whether you have a corporate agenda or are driving a community or family idea, the rules of the game are the same.

Your potential win may mean everyone wins, but if it is you driving the idea, then others first must see the potential win for themselves if they are to enter the game and... stay in it.

Of course, you know all this, it may seem like textbook management. However, my stance is that you manage processes and you lead people. It is knowing how to lead and get the result you want that is key. Leading is not a one-off interaction with others blindly following, it requires constant monitoring.

People do not mean for their enthusiasm to wane, they may not even understand it themselves. If you have ever been excited about promoting an idea, then find at the time of picking up the phone to connect your enthusiasm wanes, then you know what I mean. Acting on an idea often looks easier from a distance, the closeness of action is another thing.

People may appear to be complex chameleons, slippery creatures who don't always stick to what they say they want to do and actually do it. Their enthusiasm wanes based on a variety of factors, especially their emotional resilience, which has a tremendous impact on motivation.

If you consider how complex you are, you will appreciate that others are as well! They are driven from deep within and so oftentimes, immediate reaction is a shallow representation of many filters of experience, and often because of how they feel!

So it is from an unconscious level that motivation and enthusiasm is sourced. It seems appropriate then, that you best look deeper than a person's behaviour to find out what they want... enter desire versus duty.

Imagine for a moment you know you must do something out of duty that you are not really happy to do. How engaged are you? How rapidly do you respond? If you respond rapidly, is that because you want to get it over and done with, you endure it and smile through the process?

Conversely, imagine you really desire to do something and cannot wait to get started. How engaged are you? How rapidly do you get started? Do you even need to think about doing it?

Please know that I am not for one moment suggesting that is is a clear choice between desire and duty, nor am I suggesting that the issue is not complex.

What I am suggesting is that if you have a clear feeling of struggle from imagining the duty scenario and a clear feeling of ease from the desire scenario, then how can you expect others to join the flow of your enthusiasm if you are not clear what enthuses them and what they perceive as desire and duty?

Duty is easy if the duty leads to a desirable outcome, it is a struggle if it is linked to dread, boredom or have to do!

Imagine having others as focused and enthusiastic as you, motivated for their own end? Everyone wins!

You know this, though you may sometimes forget and I am here to remind you by being a catalyst for your brilliance.

These monthly grabs are created to be useful, to get you questioning how you are being your best and to give you an insight into my approach to getting new perspectives.

Until next month do your duty from desire and create a flow of enthusiasm!

Noelene Dawes

From Expectation to Exceptional Experience

2009-08-04T13:08:00.005+10:00

Utilising Emotional Resilience in Business

If you were to create a movie that exudes the effectiveness you have achieved and the satisfaction you feel about your life in business to date, would the viewers be encountering a story more akin to gliding in a gondola or riding a roller coaster?

It matters little which one you prefer, but it does matter if you expect one and get the other!

A preferred experience is a classic story with expectations met, obstacles navigated and a satisfied happy ending.

If you are demanding the gondolier speed up and lose the other vessels in his wash, or complain the roller coaster is making you sick, then best you look at your expectations and how you are preparing yourself for the ride, especially if this happens over and over again!

Imagine if you could produce and direct your business life movie to be classic story variety as the rule rather than the exception? What would that do for you now in your current role? How would that make a difference to your future effectiveness and satisfaction as well as the fond memories you have of the finished movie?

A favourite movie is one that re-runs as a memory for a variety of occasions. Your movie memory can be a rich reminder in a time of reflection, an uplifting reward in times of trouble and a powerful sample of a tried and true account worthy of replicating for your next production.

To be a favourite it should be professionally produced and well-directed and not necessarily a high budget production. It just takes focus, awareness and flexibility; add commitment and you have a box-office hit!

Deciphering the plot of your best and worst experiences is a good way to start. By re-running each as a movie in your mind you will get the real experience of how your expectations were met, or not, complete with emotions good and bad!

If you are the adventurous type then you will enjoy the exhilaration, if you are a peace seeker then you will appreciate the solace. No matter the specific situation and resultant emotion it is whether you are feeling emotionally resilient throughout that tells the real story, the story that relates you being satisfied with the ending.

Being emotionally resilient is about feeling strength in your core, a strength that comes from a calm place deep within. Having this strength you are most likely to set realistic expectations and be least rattled when things go awry. You know that whatever the situation you have a calm resolve that keeps you clear, alert and flexible as you remain in control.

The movie of your worst experience shows you reacting to the pressures that arise as your not so best self, causing you to expand the risks and as a result, perhaps even multiply the negative consequences. This movie is gripping, the stuff terrifying action movies are made of! Fear and fright, much of which is caused by the experience not meeting expectations!

The best experience movie shows you at your best, able to be the one who is in control and helps to nullify the risks and lead yourself and others through to a satisfying conclusion. Perhaps the story may have dilemmas and dire circumstance, but you move through like a modern day hero or heroine.

It is useful to ask your self, what are the differing circumstances in the design of the two plots? In other words, what circumstances help you to be at your best, your most emotionally resilient self and what drives you off course?

To be a specialist in producing and directing your own classic movie focus on the following 3 elements:

First, have a clear outcome. If you are not clear what you want to achieve through your experience, and what is important to you, then you find it difficult to make decisions in the moment when your movie is being made.

Second, be aware of the environment that you are going into, the possible risks and how to ensure your planning and preparation averts these.

Third, be flexible when you are in the midst of your movie. I am sure you can appreciate that having the first two elements covered makes being flexible so much easier. You are well informed and emotionally prepared for any misadventure or indeed positive opportunity that may arise.

Things can and will go wrong, which gives the plot it's excitement and helps test your effectiveness. A key element is in managing your level of expectation! To be very dissatisfied you must first have a high level of unrealistic expectations.

When you are emotionally resilient you will handle the rigours of business life with ease. In addition to planning and forethought, do as much as you can to care for your brain and body through rest, nutrition, meditation, exercise or whatever helps you feel your best and live your best business life, moving your expectation to exceptional experience!

Noelene Interviewed about Emotional Resilience

2009-08-04T12:22:00.001+10:00

This is a 24 minute live interview on Emotional Resilience. Noelene is being interviewed by James Adonis for his Team Leaders Management Development Program on 31 July 2009.
http://www.teamleaders.com.au/

Superman Wonder Woman and Other Hero Personas

2009-08-04T10:42:00.004+10:00

From mild mannered mortals to legendary idealists with a call to action and the donning of a costume!

Consider these legendary super heroes and their appeal... What is the attraction?

Perhaps it is the rush of the sudden might and skill to save the day, the attractive figure they cut in their unique hero attire that exemplifies winning, or that you can count on them to be stand up for good over evil when all else is lost!

I wonder if these fantasy figures or alternatively, your favourite hero if you cannot associate with these, has a spark of cool that inspires you to motivation, causes you to associate with them, or wish you could naturally emulate them?

One thing is for sure, as you watch an episode part of you may want their true identity revealed as mild mannered ordinary folk, while the other part never wants it revealed lest the fantasy be ruined.

These two fantasy characters have much in common with many legendary super heroes including their total self-belief and self-confidence, the finesse and ease with which they act out their wisdom and that they consistently achieve a winning outcome.

If you could don the costume or more specifically, the persona, of your favourite super hero, how would that help you in the world of business?

Perhaps you think this is a flight of fancy? Perhaps, but come with me anyway...
In the business context, if I asked you to put on a persona for each of the following, how would you act them out, what immediate behaviours stereotypical of each springs to mind for?...

Bank Teller, Salesperson, Administrator, CEO, IT test analyst, CFO, Marketing Manager and HR Manager.

Now think about each persona and how it may change if this person was to step up when the pressure is on and positively save the day. What do you notice?

What is real is that the persona under normal circumstances does not completely alter when they step up to save the day, but rather it is magnified.

Sometimes they may look different because of the extreme shift. It is almost like they have put on a costume! However, if they are to be real and bring through their super hero persona the thread of that behaviour must be stored away in ready reserve, much like the costume of our super heroes.

Have you ever donned a costume for a party, perhaps somewhat reluctantly at first, and found that you begin to not only take on the persona but really enjoy it? I wonder if you search your memory do you find some extremes of persona came out to play?

You influence every minute with the persona you naturally convey. If you want to positively influence your persona must come from positivity.

If you want to lead and/or sell with confidence and belief then first you must find belief and confidence within you. If not for you personally then for the cause you are stepping forward to defend.

If you can't easily access the necessary attributes of the persona, imagine you are your own super hero and are called upon to save the day. Remember, you don't need to change, you simply need to bring out the best of yourself.

To access this you need either a reason big enough or consequences dire enough. Where are you now on that scale? If you are not motivated to action for yourself, ask yourself, What are my colleagues or clients missing out on when I am not stepping up?

Your world needs you, it is your destiny calling! Be your own super hero! Otherwise your world could be left with a Mickey or Minnie Mouse solution, which may be a laugh, but is unlikely to save the day.

Until next month, don your cape and fly!

Noelene Dawes

Still or Sparkling a Fine Choice!

2009-07-02T15:08:00.002+10:00

A matter of taste, timing or temperament?

No matter your beverage of choice alcoholic or otherwise, your selection may differ based on a pattern of steady choice, the time and type of occasion or your mood.

It is like that with personality, the style you demonstrate and the style you appreciate in others.

Does your natural style tend toward still or sparkling, that is introverted or extroverted?

How does that change with pressure and circumstance?

How does that affect your ability to positively influence?

Do you judge others according to their still or sparkling preference?

It is only when you become aware of how your choice of style affects your ability to influence the outcome for any situation or event that you can be more wise with your selection.

I wonder if you have noticed that your preference for still or sparkling company may depend on the events of the day, which potentially affects your level of emotional resilience and hence your taste, timing and temperament!

As you evolve you begin to learn about how you are wired for stillness or sparkle and how that affects your ability to lead and influence people and situations. You also learn that your style is not absolute, you can and often may be flexible in your style whilst maintaining your authenticity and being true to your values, what is important to you.

Leaders know that they need to make a space for others to demonstrate their skills and talents regardless of his or her bent towards still or sparkling, which affects how each communicates the output of those skills and talents.

In fact, it may be useful for you to notice how you automatically change in the company of others, since that informs you as to your level of flexibility and how you can adjust if you consider it useful to do so.

The wonderful thing for me as a student of unlocking the potential of people, I routinely notice personality and behaviour. I remember a specific 3-way conversation some years ago where I became acutely aware and appreciative of my own flexibility.

Those of you who know me well will choose sparkling for me and still for my husband Ian. In this conversation Ian was in active sparkle, our friend a close second sparkle and me very still allowing and enjoying the sparkle in the space surrounding me. Who would have thought it possible?

The capacity to be flexible is valuable and coupled with responsibility for helping those we lead develop, it helps induce wisdom. However, that flexibility can only be developed once we are aware of how we can flex, a matter of taste, timing and temperament.

Humans are always judging, we judge ourselves and each other, it is how we are wired. Judging, in this context, is nether bad not good it just is. It helps us to continually calibrate elements that affect our surroundings and our response to them. As a result we pick up clues about how our choices for still or sparkling affect our own results as well as others and their results.

Influential leaders know how emotional resilience affects their ability to flex. This helps them to be strong and calm as they are authentically still and sparkling as the situation demands. This flexibility is true for many filters of personality within us all, building these builds leadership.

Until next month celebrate with still or sparkling, it is a fine choice!

Noelene Dawes

From Consternation to Curiosity

2009-05-27T17:16:00.000+10:00

So things are flowing along well with the occasional hiccup that is mostly easily overcome, when it seems quite suddenly, everything changes.

Equilibrium is upset, hiccups become more like constant reflux and the heartburn sets in.

Things may be sorted out if it wasn’t for some offensive person (or indeed people) behaving like a complete idiot and making you feel sick to your stomach!

You ask yourself, how can they behave so badly? How can they not see the truth of the matter? How are they so missing the point? How can they not consider others in this situation? How can they be so aggressive? Or alternatively, how can they be so apathetic?

So I wonder how is your pressure level in this and how are you behaving?

Perhaps you are the one feeling the pressure and the resultant heartburn, everyone around you unaware and not able to detect the symptoms, let alone assist?

People feel pressure from different stimuli, the way they feel pressure is unique and the resultant behaviour is often hard to swallow, seemingly impossible to diagnose the cause let alone prescribe a remedy. When you are the one suffering the pressure it may be even more difficult to find a remedy.

It is also worth considering that pressure is felt in both negative and positive change, because… well it is change and it is natural. The problem is that change upsets the balance, true butterflies in the stomach or feelings of listlessness and dread.

My treatment program provides a cure for the acute condition and an ongoing pain management program.

My prescription is to become curious!

If you now bring to mind a situation about which you may have feelings of consternation or dismay ask yourself:

What are the external forces at play?
How is each of these elements affecting the situation?
How is that likely to be impacting the person concerned, their motivators, those close to them?
Who or what else is playing a part?

Any question that informs you will assist you in becoming rational about a situation and in doing so will help you tap into your innate skills to deal with the situation. You are then more likely to come from a place of wisdom rather than needing to be right!

Ask yourself the following questions to determine whether your … is painful enough to warrant treatment. If so please use my prescription to “Be Curious”… no charge!

What is it that causes you to feel utterly dismayed?
What effect does it have on your ability to respond rationally?
What effect does your state of consternation and utter dismay have on your productivity?
What about your ability to relate to the person or people involved?
What is the cost to you and your business?

Enjoy being curious!

Noelene Dawes

All Power To You… at the Flick of a Switch

2009-05-27T17:03:00.002+10:00

3 Techniques for turning on and tuning your electrics

How powerful do you feel right now? Are you feeling influential and in control? What does that feeling you have right now allow you to do, or not do?

What would it be like to be able to flick a switch to turn on your personal power grid when you need it most?

You already do this of course, but sometimes the line might have static, the connection interrupted by an unexpected wave of emotion or even worse experiences an uncontrollable surge.

If you could benefit from maintenance on your internal electrics or know some other person who could do with some help, pay close attention and I will tell you what you already know.

Why would you want to find out something you already know? Well perhaps you don’t know the access code or have forgotten it!

Let’s consider best you and not at your best you. Best you when all your circuitry is clear and you have a sense of certainty and clarity. You may have noticed that best you can easily access full power, no fog in front of you, no extra weight to carry on your shoulders, and no annoying noise to distract you.

No matter what the conditions you respond with positive power and lead others through calm or storm.

Technique 1 - Ask yourself now… What are the conditions that set up this personal state or mood? You have felt this before… find the patterns that work for you.

What about not at your best you when intellectually you think you will respond well, but your intellectual ideal and reality fail to meet? When your response to challenge or change gets a different result than you expected and you know you were responsible, however small your part?

These are your negative patterns at work, those that don’t serve you. Relax, we all have them, this is a part of what makes us unique… just like everybody else!

You know about these patterns, want to change them, but despite how hard you try to adjust, they recur.

Trying is your conscious mind trying to control your unconscious mind at a conscious level. I wonder if you realise how futile this is?

The conscious mind can hold 7 plus or minus 2 pieces of information at any one time. This is like a few circuits perched atop a major power grid trying to drive it!

In order to change any behaviour patterns you need to affect the change at a deep level. The greater the change you want the deeper into your wiring you must begin the repair.

Technique 2 – Ask yourself now… Do I have a reason big enough or a consequence dire enough to want to change at a deep level?

Ah! But right now is the quick fix switch the one you most want?
This one will give you a quick spark to begin to engage you in repairing the others.

Technique 3 – Ask yourself now… How can I think more expansively right now? Get up and look out the window, get a larger picture in front of you. Do this now so you remember how effective it is when next you get a wave of emotion come over you, static in your circuits or an uncontrollable surge.

This technique works because it moves your mind to a different perspective. In effect you are leading yourself out of a blockage and into clear circuitry. Only then can you lead others in the same direction.

Until next time, be electric, emotionally resilient and go with positive charge!

Noelene Dawes

Maintaining Personal Power in a Changing World

2009-04-14T19:42:00.001+10:00

Excerpts from a speech to the Sydney Chapter of the Project Management
Institute (PMI) by Noelene in March 2009.

Be the Corporate Horse Whisperer

2009-02-26T19:02:00.005+11:00

Corral the conflict of the power stallions

Imagine yourself as a horse whisperer specialising in dealing with corporate stallion behaviour, you know the type…. males and/or females who exert that stallion-like behaviour, protecting their paddock, driving newcomers off, snorting at new ideas and rearing up, driving fear and dread into the hearts of those who dare enter their patch and take some of their herd… their power!

From Mandarin to Mouldy Mass… and other changes

2009-02-16T18:02:00.003+11:00

The mild odour seemed to come and go. The windows were opened wider, though the waft of fresh air was somewhat stifled by the intricacies of the layout, which was poorly positioned for flow through.

Annoyance, frustration and curiosity wafted in and out as did the odour. Mild became mid-range then strong. Frustration came and went until finally the odour moved up a final notch to outright stench causing a thorough search by unwillingly willing nostrils to uncover the offending object.

As the bag was opened the dusty mould filtered through the air. The steps back with much aghast did little to reveal what the mouldy mass once was.

Level headed clean up completed I tracked back in my memory to the last time I used the old bag. “Deary me! It is that mandarin I used as that seriously meaningful metaphor so many speeches ago. It has taken on a whole new meaning now! What am I, a child who has left fruit in her school bag?”

My first instinct was to throw out the bag. It was expensive to purchase a new one, though smelly it was once a sense of pride and still useful. I painstakingly cleaned and refreshed it, all the while moving between mild self-loathing, disbelief that I had caused myself this angst and mild amusement. Eventually I accepted that I am both grown and yet have some way to go and eventually had a good laugh.

When people grow they are known as adults. Adults are expected to do adult things. They expect to be in control and others expect it of them. So we all put on our adult masks. Being an adult is serious business, but it is when you take yourself too seriously that you trip up and the mask falls off. How embarrassing!

Of course, this is nature’s way of creating change. We often refuse to deal with things until they either explode or rot in a bag somewhere, hidden from view but not from other senses.

Like it or not things change. Growth only happens through change. You can resist it, perhaps throw the bag out and kid yourself that you are now rid of that problem.

Experience tells me though, that most people make the same errors over and over. It is only when you have said enough is enough in acknowledgement that the matter needs attention that you can work through the issue. Once worked through to a resolution it very often magically ceases to matter any more and you can move to the next level of growth.

No growth happens without some suffering, it is the natural way, and it is our resistance to deal with it that causes the angst.

There are mandarins in bags everywhere, best check your bags and attend to the things that will matter if you don’t give them attention.

Whether it be (dare I mention it!) the global economic crisis, an ongoing business issue or a family conflict, summon your best self, decide on the ultimate outcome you desire and work with those concerned to deal with it.

When you need help with this please contact me. It is best you have someone to help that understands the territory. I am still finding the occasional mandarin… metaphorically speaking of course!

Until next time, be brave, emotionally resilient and go with change!

Noelene Dawes

Noelene's new photo by Jon Dawes.
To see Jon's Photographic Portfolio click here

Turn fantasy into fact by being seriously creative

2009-01-22T18:31:00.002+11:00

Take the “ho hum” out of goal setting and replace it with maximum motivation by learning from the Father of fantasy, a master of financial success.

Business Progresses When People Connect

2008-12-17T12:48:00.002+11:00

Take the work out of networking - get results and enjoy the experience.

The term "networking" is used in many contexts in business. In a broader sense it means "connecting" and in the human sense “people connecting with people". As economies become global, networking becomes even more critical in promoting and effecting business success.

Dwarfing Santa

2008-12-03T12:53:00.004+11:00

As the countdown to the holiday season gathers momentum work commitments speed up, family expectations heat up, calendars become full and choices must be made! At least, that is the smart thing to do.

Sometimes though, the Santa season tends to invoke a frenzy of eventful activity that sensible people wouldn’t entertain any other time of the year! The resultant emotive activity has the potential to wear out the most energetic of people before the actual family events take place.

As a result some may take on personalities akin to the seven dwarfs. Some starting off as Happy, some party resistors are Bashful, too much indulgence send them Dopey, as a result becoming Grumpy, Sleepy and if sufficiently worn out they become Sneezy and have to see Doc!

Throw Snow White into the mix and they are all in a decidedly poor state to meet and influence new people at the myriad of cocktail events and certainly in a dangerous mood to mix with family. This includes mixing with family who are close and loving as well as those they must see and don’t particularly want to.

Now you may be wondering what the Seven Dwarfs and Snow White references have to do with Santa? You are right, not much. They are just as out of place as bad moods and bad behaviour, when the intention of the season is peace and love. Bad behaviour has the effect of dwarfing Santa and that is a bad look in anyone’s terms, one that is often talked about for generations.

So why do perfectly sensible people behave badly and how can you ensure you are not one of them? After all, it is far more useful to be a good elf than a bad dwarf.

It is usual that the lead up to events of a festive nature evokes excitement as well as dread and can set up a potential emotional and all too familiar pantomime.

There are however, ways to ensure you are more likely to enjoy the performance rather than feel performance anxiety… it is all a matter of perspective.

The top 3 ways to enjoy the performance are:

Plan to be wise and you will be – a sage is a good listener with an open rational mind. Focus on the other person and their message. No matter how well you think you know a person, you will change the relationship for the better.
Plan to enjoy people and you will – There is no benefit to you or anyone else by coming to an event with past prejudices or dread about some person or issue. Just be your best rational self and remember as you show respect you may very well get it.
Plan to be curious and you will be calm – Adopting a perspective of curiosity ensures you think and behave from your rational brain. You become interested in others, their stories, their perspective and you potentially connect with them in a genuine and open manner. You may even learn something about them that you actually appreciate.

These steps contain simple powerful suggestions to help you remain rational in a potentially emotional situation and to be fully present. This ensures you enjoy a blissful performance as a good elf.

Showing you how to be present is my present to you. Your presence is your present to yourself and others.

Until next time, be emotionally resilient and enjoy the holiday season!

Noelene Dawes

Heroes Emerge From Pressure Cookers

2008-10-29T14:40:00.004+11:00

As the pressure cooker that is business reality heats up you feel the squeeze. As the actual or perceived effects of the economic downturn edge closer to your sector and those around begin to squirm, you begin to feel things going beyond warm. As you try not to get distracted, external forces are demanding your attention and the pressure builds.

Leaders are born of these environments… isn’t it exciting? Could you be the one who transforms through this time, being stronger, more skilful and leveraging your experience for future positive positioning?

Of course, you may say that it all depends on market forces, how your organisation is impacted and in turn how safe your position is. Sensible risk assessment practice dictates these to be useful considerations. However, if you are feeling the squeeze and want to take control consider the following…

Written leadership history, local leadership knowledge and your own experience will tell you that it is from this very environment (one of uncertainly) that leaders written about tomorrow emerge today. These leaders must have the emotional resilience, the will and skill to think and act rationally, decisively, with certainty and empathy.

I am sure you have heard it said that “It is not what happens to you, it is what you do about it”. My perspective is that this statement must be amended to add “And, provided you learn the lessons from the experience you will lead yourself to another level and be a hero, a role model for others”

There is a theme that runs through the experience of every person or team I work with as a coach and mentor, one that keenly complies with the common cycle of growth of the human psyche.

The origin of my fascination for this aspect of personal leadership growth sits within the research domain of one of my heroes, Joseph Campbell, who coined the phrase “the Hero’s Journey”. An American literary professor (come anthropologist) of the 1950s, Campbell was fascinated by the myths and legends across all societies and the common theme that connected them.

Borrowing from Campbell’s work of genius, I offer a summary of how I see the experience of how your leadership growth may occur:

You are called to serve – offered a position or perhaps a crisis to manage
You at first refuse the call – perhaps you think “That is not for me’ or “Let someone else do it”
You finally accept the call – “Okay I will do it”
You receive a gift – get the job, perhaps status and resources
You encounter the supreme ordeal – the pressure is on and you feel the squeeze “Why did I do this to myself?”
You use the gift – you do the job using all the resources you have, delegate and/or not, take a higher perspective and/or get bogged down, behave appropriately and/or inappropriately etc.
Achieve your quest – achieve objectives and breathe a sigh of relief
Get the real gift – reflect on the errors and wins, learn from the experience and grow in leadership skill
Get a new call!

N.B. Unless you do step 8, “Get the real gift”, you most likely will have the same experience again and again until you learn and grow!

My role is to help you identify and interrupt the pattern to allow you to be clear about where you are heading, assess the risks and navigate the obstacles. Once you are guided through a complete cycle and actually get the learning, you get a new perspective on guiding yourself to and through the future.

Where are you right now? What step do you need help with and how best can I help?

Until next time, examine some more free resources via the links provided, be emotionally resilient and enjoy business life!

Noelene Dawes

A Vision of Values

2008-09-05T13:50:00.007+10:00

The terms vision and values may have differing affects on different people depending upon experience. These perfectly innocent words have been bandied around business organisations to such a degree, that eyes can glaze over from the memory of vision and values exercises often going nowhere and having little positive effect.

Even where the terms remain positive, there is often frustration with identifying what a personal vision is and what values support that vision. These terms are often too nebulous to grasp and sometimes may leave an empty feeling given the inability to verbalise an inspiring phrase or carry it around in a back pocket!

Put aside any prejudice and you will find them to be useful allies in the pursuit of purpose both great and small.

Here’s the thing… each term on its own can seem empty, just rhetoric or a motherhood statement. Combine them and you have engagement.

In a business sense vision may be usefully defined as “an observable outcome evidenced by specific criteria, sometimes set in a specific timeframe”. Although this can serve as a useful guideline for a personal vision, the perfectly formed nature of the definition can constrain rather than free your imagination.

Not withstanding the importance of specifics, for some it may be more useful to think of your personal vision as a state of being, being engaged in doing something, or having achieved something. Bottom line though, unless you are engaged and invested in the outcome motivation is absent.

Enter values… simply put values are deep-seated emotional feelings; they are often difficult to express in words. Values embody what is important to you and are supported by your beliefs.

Your values powerfully affect whether you truly align with your vision, and if not considered can prevent you from achieving it.

Vision plus values equals engagement!

It is important to note that it is useful to form a vision that you can strive for and ultimately reach, but will also be experiencing in some way each day. For example, a valued vision built around contributing to world peace is off track if you are continually in conflict with those around you! You must live as the person you want to become.

There is nothing more powerful to move you from pressure into emotional resilience and ultimately achievement than the perspective of a valued vision. This becomes a prime navigational tool to ensure today’s behaviour becomes tomorrows dream, your valued vision.

My business valued vision is to be recognised as the expert in helping leaders move from pressure to emotional resilience.

My personal valued vision is to continue to inspire and be inspired through useful contribution.

In the snippets of useful information I write you will find the thread of my experience, creativity and modus operandi. Should you be ready to activate the fullness of your talent best arrange a meeting with me soon!

Until next time, examine some more free resources, be emotionally resilient and enjoy life in business!

The Point Of Pressure

2008-08-10T18:21:00.004+10:00

Pressure is a perfectly useful stimulus for change, in fact nothing moves without it. How useful or perfect it is depends on your position and perhaps, whether you perceive it as positive or negative, are witnessing the response of others to pressure, or experiencing it firsthand!

World financial markets are a classic example. The media is full of factual information and sensational stories. How affected you are may depend on your exposure to the stock market and/or level of debt, need for cash and risk profile.

As an observer, media reports are simply words read by someone who values knowledge of current market trends. Should you be imminently adversely affected however, you will be more likely to be experiencing pressure.

For some it may be crisis management. However, it is more likely to be more drawn out, a feeling of constant worry, struggle and often overwhelm. The problem may be immediate, the consequences perceived as long term and negative.

This situation is a useful metaphor for ongoing corporate change… the perspectives are the same, the circumstances slightly different. In the case of corporate change, fear of loss, failure and of the future gets in the way of optimistic outlook and motivation to get on with business as usual. Any negative change in circumstances, if perceived to be big enough, will bite.

It is challenging to appreciate the pressure a colleague or staff member feels. Further to this, two people sharing exactly the same experience will most certainly feel different levels of pressure and respond quite differently.

To experience pressure is natural, the absence of pressure suggests the absence of growth. It is your response that counts.

Leading yourself and others whilst under pressure is when your ability to influence, make decisions and communicate with others is tested. If you deal well with pressure, you may find it challenging to understand when others do not. However, unless you dwell in a cave 24/7 you will not be able to avoid the perils of dealing with the pressure that others experience.

The experience of pressure can be described as “A real response to a perceived adverse stimulus”.

Ask yourself these questions to assess the effectiveness of your response, or your people’s response, to pressure.

As you approach these questions, imagine the context of being under constant pressure:

Do you know and do what is important?

Are you directed towards an outcome with realistic expectations?

Do you quickly grasp a situation?

Do you effectively manage emotion?

Do you feel influential and in control?

Are you realistically optimistic?

Are you open to input from others?

Do you illustrate empathy whilst responding appropriately?

How far toward the positive or negative you respond to these questions determines your level of emotional resilience.

Given your answers, what is your pressure point, that is, the point that pressure tips the scales and causes a negative reaction in you or your team?

The whole point I am making is that the loss of momentum caused by the adverse pressure experience costs individuals, business and communities momentum, masses of money, time and illness. Not to mention how dreary life at work becomes when people are constantly in a bad mood!

Assess your exposure to the risk of pressure on your business, and then call me when you are ready for positive intervention.

Until next time, be emotionally resilient and enjoy life in business!

Results Through Change

2008-08-10T18:04:00.004+10:00

You can read this title in several ways, putting emphasis on different words. Similarly to the myriad of ways you can interpret a message, people sense different messages in change, depending on their experience and their approach.

My approach is of course to do with the behaviour of people, you, your peers, those you report to and those who report to you.

“The only person who likes change is a wet baby!” a quote written some years ago by my friend, Catherine DeVrye, expert on customer service. As with many corporate technologies, napkin technology has changed. Babies now are less likely to directly feel the consequences of being soiled. As a result, napkin change is delayed although it is still necessary since other senses clearly detect the reality as the weight becomes heavier!

So what seems like progress in one sense may just be a cover up! This may seem like an erky subject… but… it may be a perfect metaphor since some of you may sense change as equally on the nose!

The problems of change in business are many and varied but none so challenging as the variety of responses people have to it.

Consider the following…

How on board are you with change?
How do you best respond to other people’s responses to change?
What are you most concerned about during the impending change?
What is your concern for the future after the change?
What strategies do you have to lead yourself and others?

During change there may be a response similar to grief, perfectly natural yet challenging to manage. It is critical you acknowledge where you and others are in the process in order to recognise how to move through the phases so you can help others through and achieve a positive result.

Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced the five phases of grief, and she suggests they apply to a myriad of change events. Kübler-Ross observed that people may not experience all phases but will experience at least two.

The stages as I apply them to corporate change are:

Denial – surely this can’t be happening, not to us, not now!
Anger – how ridiculous, how futile!
Bargaining – I’ll stay if…
Depression – it’s all too hard!
Acceptance – well I guess this is really happening! How can I make the best of it?

People need to be first listened to then encouraged and guided to a new perspective. One that allows them to find opportunity based on their ultimate outcome and personal motivators.

Some will more easily feel optimistic and opportunistic about change. However, this does not mean they escape the process, including having to deal with those who are feeling the negative effects, which can be equally frustrating and challenging.

Consider the following for a new perspective…

Change is so frequent in business today it takes some fancy footwork to not change… best use the energy to go with it.

Universal law dictates there are always positive and negative aspects to all things… have reasonable expectations.

You can only lead yourself and others through a challenging experience once you feel emotionally resilient… you can then evaluate effectively, decide rationally and perform effortlessly.

In order to lead another… you must appreciate and understand how they feel and where they stand.

It is not possible to lead someone across a chasm… until you have made the leap yourself.

Change takes you to the precipice of the chasm where your leadership is tested.

Once you have a clear outcome, a strong purpose and the emotional resilience to fuel your leap… you fly. In doing so you create a flight path for others!

Until next time, be emotionally resilient and enjoy life in business!

Results… Your Leadership Legacy

2008-07-02T12:58:00.004+10:00

What will remain of your Leadership long after you move on?

Who is it that you would name as the one Leader you have had that inspired you?

What specifically did that person do to achieve that memorable status?

The role of a Leader is to get results for the business through the people you Lead. One aspect is inseparable from the other.

The more people you Lead the more critical your propensity to deal with pressure.

Whose pressure? In a previous posting I used your ability to deal with your own pressure as the subject. Let’s now look at your ability to deal with the pressure those you Lead experience.

Pressure is not real it is perceived! As a Leader you may have that worked out. So how well do you manage the pressure that others experience, those to whom you delegate and so on down the line?

The notion of “Pressure” is one that I notice is an issue that pervades the daily environment of players in the corporate world. My focus on this subject has sparked a great deal of interest from people around the globe.

Having asked for input from my LinkedIn network “What is your biggest Leadership challenge when the pressure is on?”; raising the issue in my Ezine; and in my most recent keynote speech; I received a myriad of comments with startling similarities. I even received input from a former officer in the Royal Marines, now Leading teams into Polar Regions.

These findings are amongst information I will discuss in an upcoming eBook I am writing on the subject. Those of you who contributed will receive a complimentary copy, many thanks.

Bottom line… two major aspects topped the list…

1. Taking a wider perspective in order to light the way.
2. Not being drawn into the pressure others are experiencing.

But how… a comment from a local esteemed colleague suggested “Having sufficiently invested in the emotional bank account of those you Lead during a business as usual environment so that they will easily follow you when the pressure is on”. Thank you Stuart!

Whether you have a few or many people reporting to you, or your Leadership is a dotted line of influence Leadership, it is vital to your results to have the ongoing ability to influence others with integrity and authenticity.

Sound like a motherhood statement? Perhaps, but… if you want to leave a legacy of results and emotionally resilient people who view you as one of the best Leaders they have had, you are wise to take it seriously!

How well do you know your people? Ask your self, for each individual you Lead and influence…

What is their outcome/vision for themselves career and personally?
How does their current position support their outcome /vision?
What drives or motivates them on a daily basis?
What do they worry about?
What do they not want in their work?
How do they respond to pressure? Or, how emotionally resilient are they?

Once you have pondered these questions, send me your feedback and ask me a question! Click Here (name and email address are optional - if you include them I will provide a personal response).

Until next time, be emotionally resilient and enjoy life in business!

Manage Processes - Lead People

2008-04-30T16:35:00.002+10:00

A leader's audit on personal influence.

When you think of a true leader, who stands out in your mind? Why is that?

There is a Fine Line Between Pressure and Pain!

2008-04-30T10:42:00.002+10:00

Pressure has the potential to start you up and close you down!

Pressure is an essential ingredient in getting you engaged, focused and in action. Without it enthusiasm and motivation can easily wane. In my experience the upside of pressure is easily overlooked in a world where the negativities of pressure are topical.

Pressure is not good or bad it just is. It is your response to pressure that counts. This affects your ability to use your talent and influence to rise above challenge, make appropriate decisions and influence others through the resultant implementation of those decisions.

As I write this I am considering you reading this in a normal frame of mind on a “business as usual” day. Therefore as you sit and read this you most likely agree so far and feel you respond well to pressure. I wonder if you would have the same response if you were feeling pressure now, since Leading when the pressure is on may seem easy in theory before or after the fact? Try this…

Imagine a continuum of pressure, get a pen and paper and draw this as a straight line from left to right. Consider carefully and subjectively plot the points at which you:

Get fired up
Keep focused
Trigger emotionally driven frustration
Tip into overwhelm

Congratulate yourself on what you do well. Then…

What do your positive pressure points allow you to do?
How do they assist you to positively influence?
What can you now do better from becoming aware of this?

Then…

What are the negative behaviour patterns that result from the negative pressure points?
What is this costing you in time, energy, influence?
How would addressing that allow you to improve your bottom line result?
How aware are you of the pressure points of those you Lead and actively influence?

Pressure is perceived not real! Although it seems to come from external sources it is your response to the environment that triggers it. Enter Emotional Resilience!

Emotionally Resilient people rise to the top regardless of the situation. They make rational decisions in emotional situations. This is key to Leading when the pressure is on.

Practical strategies integrated with personal management systems provide a compass in the densest situations. All you need is a strong motivation to positively enhance your skills and to call me!

What question would you like to ask me about Leading when the pressure is on? Click here to ask a question (name and email address are optional - if you include them I will provide a personal response).

Until next time, be emotionally resilient, play with pressure, and enjoy life in business!

Influence is not a digital technology it is an analogue art form!

2008-04-15T17:26:00.004+10:00

When it comes to influence you are always on, it is just a matter whether the tone, volume and content you are using resonates well with people.

In my experience, most people only think of influencing as something you do with intention… However, it is how you influence when you just do what you do that determines how effective you are when influencing with intention.

People who influence others to action are Leaders by the nature of the action their behaviour inspires.

Think now of someone who inspires you to action. This may be someone you know well or someone on the world stage. Note the reasons you admire them then consider the observable behaviour that led you to believe in them. This person may not necessarily have the title “Leader” in their resume it may have been bestowed on them by others.

Often those who find themselves with “Leader” as a title may be uncomfortable with the idea, associating the title with superiority and standing out. However, Leadership is not about being a Hollywood star it is about being a North Star, being a compass for others on the same journey. A compass is effective in any conditions, under pressure, in poor light or in a raging storm. Like a positively influential Leader it can be relied upon to give true and consistent direction.

It is only possible to enhance your influence by first identifying how you influence.

Consider these questions:

Where is your influence having the positive effect you desire and how do you know?
Where is your influence falling short and how do you know?
What do you observe others doing or not doing as a result of your influence
How is your influence benefiting others, helping you achieve your objectives and the objectives of the organisation?

The next step is to scrutinise your answers in real-time as you go about your work in a business as usual environment. Only then can you begin to make enhancements.

Remember, your influence is constantly on; it is just a matter a degrees toward the positive or negative.

Check the “Solutions for Leaders and Leadership Teams” diagnostic on my new home page. You can easily find potential problems and solutions that I can help you with by clicking on one of the three focus areas.

Individual Decision-Making
Influence For Leaders
Facilitated Group Decision-Making

Until next time, be emotionally resilient; be positively influential and Communic8 in 2008!

Are you heading for a business health crisis?

2008-03-13T17:05:00.004+11:00

Wherever you reside on this planet it is likely your news media is full of stories about the immediate and long-term community health crisis.

The focus is on what to do at a high level and no one seems to be able to fix the issues on the ground.

With an increase in the ageing population, rising obesity levels and increasing stress related illness; just to name a few issues; I am wondering where the discussion about individual proactivity is in all this?

Unless the issues are tackled at both a global and individual activity level, positive sustainable change is unlikely.

You are most likely aware of how your moment-by-moment decisions and resultant actions affect your health. Will you wait until the impact is strong enough to need medication or indeed hospitalisation, before you act? And… are you aware of the real consequences on you and your lifestyle if ill health manifests in its full capacity?

I am sure you see how easily this correlates to business issues and business practice! It is crucial to be clear about your business outcomes and practice the necessary detailed activity to achieve them.

Activity that takes you off-track and wastes time may seem small in the moment but has massive impact in the future.

Interestingly, my focus on emotional resilience encapsulates both personal and business aspects. Since without a positive personal state and good health, as well as clear personal business processes, you are unlikely to achieve your outcomes and enjoy doing so.

What seemingly insignificant negative habitual action can you decide to change and act on right now? How will changing that make a difference in you positively pursuing your business outcomes?

My Proactiv8or® learning system addresses these specific issues. It has application for both corporates and individuals. The newly released self-paced system is now available from my website.

Until next time, be emotionally resilient; make great decisions and Proactiv8 in 2008!

Are you investing or spending your time

2008-02-28T15:53:00.002+11:00

It’s February, Your New Year’s Resolution…How’s it going?

Want to know the secret to making it happen? First let’s take a light look at what my research suggests are some possible reasons for failure.

True Colours Emerge Amongst Chaos

2008-02-28T15:50:00.002+11:00

Today’s business environment is rife with chaos. Whether it is an isolated episode such as a temporary crisis or the standard environment, you can turn this challenge into opportunity, it’s all about perspective.

Doing What Thrills You!

2008-02-07T16:45:00.000+11:00

Three clues to be more you and achieve your audacious aspirations!

No wonder some goals are not achieved! Most people are looking for that elusive magic formula for effective goal setting and achievement. When the answer is right above your nose!

If how you planned last year saw you fall short of your aspirations, best use your brilliant brain to do some self-analysis and ask yourself why?

Clue 1… You are the key to your activity; the answer is in the memory of your experience. You can plan all you like, but if the necessary activity does not involve doing what thrills you in some way everyday, you will either not reach your audacious aspirations or you will feel empty having done so. Track back in your memory for clues to what you will and will not do.

Clue 2… Planning is about the future, activity to make it happen is now. My resident philosopher Ian Dawes once said, “Everything looks easy when it is a long way away”. My friend Tim Noonan* says his focus is “living an awesome life”. What a great aspiration, it fits both what he wants for the future and what he does each day.

Clue 3… It is all about being engaged in the goals you set. Use your intellect and think them through, your intuition to know they are right for you and then your instinct to feel they fit with you.

I believe we are aspiring to be our better selves, the way to that better self is to live a better self every day.

When you live in the spirit of being your best, you are more likely to make the necessary decisions to propel yourself forward, do what is necessary and be more appreciative at the end of each day. Actually, you will also be more appreciated because you will achieve more daily and people will be happier being around you.

Be more you and do what thrills you!

Surviving Christmas Emotions

2007-12-23T22:25:00.002+11:00

Three strategies to deal with the emotions wrapped up in Christmas time.

How much pressure does it take to incite the evil twin?

2007-12-18T12:18:00.000+11:00

Your emotional resilience is evident only when you feel pressure.

Your business relies on you making a series of decisions, some major and considered, most made moment by moment as you implement the strategies associated with the big decisions. No matter the size or type of decision, the quality of your decisions determines the quality of your output and subsequently your results. Add pressure and the game is on!

Of course, pressure is perceived, but when you feel it upon you, it is very real in it’s impact on your behaviour and your results.

Pressure is a necessary part of challenge and engagement, allowing an environment where you are your best self and can enjoy the game. No pressure and entropy seeps in. However, too much pressure and you may become your not so good other self, metaphorically like an evil twin (a technical term!).

I often think that a drive in the car is a good way to check whether my good self or my evil twin is in charge. You know… when someone cuts me off in the traffic, do I say to myself “Wow! That person is already having a bad day!” Or “What! You idiot…” as I feel my temperature rise. Or perhaps that is just me?

My work centres on helping you to discover how you make decisions under normal circumstances and especially under pressure. My fascination with people and their decision-making is a win for my clients because this is the pointy end of how my expertise helps produce improved results, which; not so incidentally; you enjoy working toward even more.

So… do you also have a metaphorical evil twin? How has your pressure level been throughout the day? Has anyone pushed your evil twin button? If so, how did this affect your behaviour and your results?

Until next time, be emotionally resilient and enjoy the pressure!

Step out of the Overwhelm Shadow and into the Light

2007-12-17T18:27:00.002+11:00

Moving from complexity to clear focus is easy once you understand the dynamics.

Can you be understood if you don’t understand?

2007-11-21T21:54:00.000+11:00

Adopt an emotionally resilient attitude to make it happen.

Blocks in business usually involve conflict. This can be conflict within, manifesting as cognitive dissonance, as well as conflict with others.

Resolution can be found by considering what is ultimately important to both parties, or to use jargon, “values”.

Unfortunately when terms like “values” seep into corporate life they can rapidly lose lustre and become a part of a bland landscape. Use the term too often and people roll their eyes or worse, feign interest. The term has been used and, some say, abused at a macro level in vision and mission statements and at a micro level within change programs.

Fundamentally “values” are a representation of what is ultimately important to you. Anything attached to importance conjures up emotion. Emotions are representations of feelings. If you are human you have them!

Conflict is emotional and where emotion resides rational thinking races away. Do you feel it? When someone offends, you often feel it before you even think it. It is most likely a clash of values.

A crucial aspect of emotional resilience is about owning your emotions and about being able to direct your responses.

This means having a strategy to immediately get that you are reacting emotionally, being able to own it and know that the other person is also doing so, and being able to find a position of wisdom and influence to resolve the situation.

Your values are “right” for you, not simply “right” in the broader sense. As soon as you begin to be curious about the other person’s values, what is important to them in this context, you begin understand. This sets you on a path to resolution, wisdom and being understood.

How wisely do you behave? And… How quickly does the wisdom kick in - before you respond or somewhere in the midst of an ongoing conflict when someone must take a stand to resolve it?

Please let me know what you think, I would love your stories and feedback…
People tell me they love the podcasts - as well as being available on this Blog they are available free on iTunes.

Meaning In Communication

2007-11-21T11:23:00.002+11:00

A Considered Perspective On Meaning In Communication.
Convert conversations from nonsense through common sense to heightened sense, when you take a considered perspective on meaning.

What are you waiting for to change?

2007-11-07T18:20:00.000+11:00

How can you make it happen?

You can lament the state of the world at large, the world immediately around you and your own personal internal world. You can easily feel offended, hurt, frustrated and annoyed and it may seem that the perpetrator/s have set out to get to you.

In my experience, the great majority of people are doing their own lamenting and their real focus is on themselves, especially when they are feeling pressure. They often act out from emotion as an unconscious act of survival and always have a positive intention for the situation “as they see, hear or feel it”.

This is as valid at a personal level as it is in the world of political instability. This is a crucial aspect of potential leadership in action!

Often it may seem to be too hard, to fruitless, or too time consuming to make an effort to make a difference. After all it’s their fault, it is they who are acting inappropriately! All would be fine if only they did/did not…

If you truly want to positively impact people and situations, reacting from intense emotion is futile and can perpetrate more complexity and misunderstanding.

To ensure you really connect you must equate the emotional with the rational. Take a step back and consider what is important to the other person, what is it that they may be thinking from their perspective. At some high level point you will each have the same intention, best consider that and begin the dialogue there… but do begin… if you genuinely want to make a difference.

In being considerate, you take on a wiser perspective and you watch your world change from the inside out.

What’s happening in your busy world right now to allow you to be different and act differently?

Who’s the Block to Achieving Your Results?

2007-11-07T16:40:00.002+11:00

A common theme is emerging in my conversations with business leaders, that although you may have autonomy to manage your team or business to achieve your results, there’s someone within your circle of influence who seems to block you at every turn. All too often this may be one of your peers, an internal supplier or even your boss!

How are you getting in your own way today?

2007-10-23T14:25:00.000+10:00

What would happen if you created a miracle and the block disappeared?

What would be different?

Experience shows me that people can be extremely obstinate at holding on to the things that hold them back. A block may be real or perceived. Either way it is a block. It may be that they don’t consciously know they have a block, but, even if they do know at an intellectual level, and know what to do about it… they often don’t!

Once a person identifies there is a block, they can decide to dissolve it now... or wait a lifetime. The first step is simply to know you have a block and to know what it is. Sometimes naming it is enough to remove it.

Do you have a block? Do you know what it is? Are you ready to do something about it? “Surely it is not that simple”, you say.

Let me know what you think, let’s discuss…

Making Certain Decisions

2007-10-16T09:51:00.002+10:00

You make decisions in every moment of every day; some are consciously considered decisions, which require learned rationale and the input of others, while others are unconscious and in the moment. Either way, the decisions you make every moment create your life in business and in general. I’ve developed a technique I call “Success Strategy”, a tool to help to make clear and certain decisions.